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Sebastian Scholl

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Hercules had this Hair Cut

There are many hair styles to choose from when customizing your personal look.  From mangy dreadlocks to a bowling ball polished scalp, every hair – and non hair –  style gives off a valuable impression about that person.  Indisputably, though, there is one style that is the most bold, bodacious and character building of all.  Using the most modern slang, those who rock this cut are still even one notch above ratchet.  Common names for this fashion include: Ape Drape Beaver Paddle, Bi – Level, Camero Cut, Buisness in the front, Party in the back, Canadian passport, Coupe Longveuil, El-camino, Hockey hair, Kentucky waterfall, Missouri comprimise, Mudflap. Neckwarmer, Ranchero, Shlong (short + long), Achy-breaky-bad-mistakey, Soccer rocker, Squirrel
pelt, Tennessee tophat and the Yep-nope.  However, it is more commonly respected and feared by its popularly used name, The Mullet.

The mullet is a style that our generation greatly lacks an appreciation and understanding of.  Back when our parents were cool, both pop stars and politicians alike could be spotted proudly rocking the infamous mullet.  The only acceptable excuses for not having a mullet were Judaism and chemo.  Men and women were distinguishable from the front yet oddly misleading from the back.  However, some punk had to step in and bring forth a reign of terror that made the “term dick head” both prevalent and appropriate.  Yes, I am referring to the bowl cut.  Since then society has yet to recover and find a unisex hair style that is both masculine yet feminine and can be proudly worn by both plumbers and presidents.  Years later, though, when our parents were agonized by nostalgia though still bound by employment, they released their creative energies upon the only things they had dictatorial control over – #US – their children.

Now, let’s sit back, enjoy a drink, and appreciate the pictures of the Last of the Mohegan children whose parents so lovingly attempted to keep glory alive through them.

An unconfirmed, but highly probably, picture of the young Manning brothers.
Mullets endow a 6th sense upon their bearer, this prodigy can sense stalkers.
Looking into the camera would have hidden his true identity.

If there were ever is a female presidential canidate for the US of A, my vote goes to this lovely lady.

Heart Breaker, Dream Maker.

Hockey fans; the few, the proud, the strong.
Finally, yours truly, the Sebastian Logan Del Monico Scholl.

Over the course of my short life I have proudly rocked most hair styles know to man.  Faux hawks, mohawks, shaved head, crew cut, corn row, dreadlocks, dreaded mohawk, the awful bowl cut, rat tail, front part, come over, liberty spikes, front flip, surfer steeze, chick hair, pony tail, side burns, goatee, slick back, mustache, straight bangs, side part and samurai tie.  However, the times where my chest was out, shoulders back, and head held highest were those when I rocked the mullet.

Dear Mom & Dad,

Thank you.


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